As I stood in the parking lot at work this morning during a fire drill, I caught myself thinking about how I would feel if the building were actually on fire.
And even though it was not an actual emergency, and I'm safely back in my dreary cube mindlessly working ad nauseam, I still have a smile on my face.
Over the weekend, C and I took a trip to see my little sister. She lives in Austin where C and I went to school, met, and began the life-long struggle for dominance that continues to be the centerpiece of our relationship.
We decided to rent a condo from a stranger on the internet for our stay there. I know it sounds like a bad idea, but there are a few really good websites out there that allow owners of rental properties to post and book their places for themselves. The end result is a nice, unique place to stay while on vacation at a very affordable price. C and I have had a lot of luck with places like this in our travels to Mexico, Europe, Argentina, and all around the US.
Except this time, there were fleas. LOTS of fleas. Everywhere. It was disturbing. From the second we walked in the door to the time we realized what was happening and said, "Holy shit, there are fleas EVERYWHERE! Run for your life!" and left, we each sustained about sixteen dozen flea bites.
Consequently, I probably have the plague. So, for the foreseeable future, I will be blogging to you from quarantine.
The CDC insists it's better this way.
C asked, upon hearing of Preacher Glenn Beck's "Restoring Honor" non-political, let's all follow one God (or else) rally, "Why doesn't someone shoot that guy?" The obvious answer, of course, is that Conservatives leaders, especially the most vocal and repulsive (I'm looking at you, Beck) are like the mythical Hydra: for every one you dispose of, two grow back in its place.
The conversation got me thinking, though, about the historical figures who have, and those who have not, fallen victim to the time honored tradition of assassination. What follows is a brief summary:
Have:
- Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr.
- JFK
- RFK
- Pope John Paul II (attempted)
- Abraham Lincoln
- Julius Caesar
- Gandhi
- John Lennon
- Malcolm X
Have not:
- Hitler
- Osama bin Laden
- Henry VIII
- Paris Hilton
- Ronald Reagan (attempted)
- Fidel Castro
- Napoleon
- The Black Eyed Peas
So there you have it, Glen. I think history has been very clear: only people who are worth a shit get assassinated. That means you can continue to do the stupid things you do without fear of violent retaliation.
If only the people who promote tolerance and peace could have that luxury...
